Wack but up.

When I was 20 and dating A’s dad, he was a graffiti artist. Artist usually have a moniker they tag up and often artists belong to a crew that has a moniker of it’s own. He told me once when they were younger and first starting out, he and friends started a crew called WBU or Wack But UP. Meaning that because they were new to the game their art was wack but, it was up.

That’s how I feel about my writing and blogging. Wack but up.

I think, as a mother, it’s so important to have a creative outlet. I started to write to challenge myself creatively. Let’s face it, my skills have deteriorated. I could use some practice. Writing on a public forum kinda scares the shiz out of me. Putting my words and myself out there…. EEEK! My attitude is, if it scares me then I better do it. And you my sweet readers are the lucky recipients of that step. So, THANK YOU for putting up with my bad grammar, punctuation and fragmented sentences. I appreciate you!

I recently updated my “About Me” section cause my old one was pretty weak sauce.

Always a work in progress over here. 🙂

Urination Station

6 weeks.

It took 6 weeks (since my last blog post) to get pee pee in the potty.

You know all those “guidelines” you read. Like, for example, these: http://www.babycenter.com/0_successful-potty-training-for-girls_11653.bc , yeah those did not work for us one bit. We’ve been working those tips since June and had a zero success rate. You know what finally worked? Losing our patience with all those above tips and showing her our frustration. J and I, on separate occasions with her, within 24 hours of each other.

“WHY won’t you go pee pee in the potty??!!”

“I know you know what to do, WHYYYYY won’t you go??!!”

She did it but not without a total screaming fit *WHILE* the pee pee was streaming down. That is how opposed to the idea she is. After she had her first potty, we celebrated. There were cheers and a happy dance and candy (which was really just a fruit juice snack). It wasn’t enough to convince her to want to do it again. She did finally go again, screaming and crying the entire time. Each day has been met with improvement. She starting to tell us, even if she is piddling the entire way to the bathroom. Trails of urine everywhere I look. The mop has taken permanent residence upstairs. Thank goodness for hardwood floors!

We had to break all the rules, errr patience to get results but we got results and have steadily got results for the past couple of weeks. I’m not sure if showing her our frustration showed her we meant serious business or what, but I’ll take it!

Dear parents, you need to control your kids. Sincerely, non-parents

Love this. I have been that woman in the grocery store and have no doubt I will be again. All I can do is stick to my guns no matter what side ways glances or unsolicited advise I receive.

Thanks for having our back!

The Matt Walsh Blog

To the fan I lost yesterday:

I don’t owe you an explanation, but I thought I’d offer one anyway. I do this more for your sake than mine. You see, maybe, as you later suggested, I was in a bad mood. Maybe I could have been a bit more polite about it. Maybe I’m more sensitive to it now that I have kids. Maybe I’m just sick of hearing these comments about parents. Maybe I know that my wife has to take the twins with her when she goes grocery shopping sometimes, so she could easily be on the receiving end of your sort of bullying. Maybe I took it personally.

Whatever the case, there I was, walking down the aisles of the grocery store looking for the ingredients for a new chili recipe I wanted to try. I heard the kid screaming from a distance; the whole store heard…

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Always hustling. (A piece of my history)

Before I met my husband, I was a single mom for many years. I was 22 when I had A, her dad and I were married briefly but after we separated, we split the custody time and split the costs for A evenly. A couple years later, I moved from Southern California to the Pacific Northwest. He still lived in California but we kept the same arrangement, that we would split the time evenly and just be financially responsible for our time. After a few years back and forth, A told me that she wanted to live with me on a more permanent basis. Her father and I decided that we would allow A to make that choice for herself and because it was her choice she had to tell her father. As you can imagine, he wasn’t happy and as a result even though the circumstances had changed, he didn’t feel he should pay me child support. So he didn’t. And I, of very limited resources could not afford to take legal action and even if I did, what I would receive (if I won) was very little… Would it even be worth it?

So I did it on my own. I was a receptionist making barely enough to cover costs in the city but I supported us without child support, parental support, ANY support. A few years later he did finally agree to start paying me child support. I have, for the last few years, received $200 per month.

I also suffer from chronic illness. I have been seeking a diagnosis for over five years but I always worked right through it until I couldn’t. About 5 years ago, I took a medical leave of absence because my health was spiraling out of control. I was dating my husband at the time and he helped support me financially and physically. I took longer than I had originally anticipated and my company could no longer hold my job for me and then I was unemployed. Even though I was without work, I have always found a way to make money…. cleaning houses, personal organization, personal assisting, odd jobs to piece together some sort of paycheck, some way to get by.

Finally, I landed a job…. 6 weeks after S was born. I had to take it. It was a great place to work. 6 months after working there, my younger brother was killed in a horrific car accident, and then my health took a nose dive and S just seemed upset. Too many emotions, maybe? … or maybe because I left so soon… or a combination of it all?? S was stressed and my husband was running his web development business from home and managing the baby while I worked, he was stressed. We thought it was best I quit my job, for S, for my health, for his stress. I wasn’t making enough money to justify putting S in daycare full time which is what we would have needed.

It was a lovely year “off” but I still found a way to make money by nannying children from home. I have been a nanny to H for 4 months now and was watching another child prior to her.

My husband is a small business owner and, for us, that means sometimes we are flush and sometimes we have lean months. For me the ebb and flow creates much anxiety, especially when I know I could be making more money. It’s been a lean summer. And even though I watch H, it’s only one or two days a week. So I told (actually insisted) my husband two weeks ago today, that I was going to look for a job, something retail maybe I could do in the evenings.

The next day, my friend, who owns a great tattoo shop in Seattle (one that I am a client of) posted on facebook that they were looking for a part time front desk person, 3 days a week. I wrote her and said I would be interested if we could work around the days I nanny H. 3 days later, I started my new job. So now, I work 9.5 hour days, 3 days a week at the shop and nanny H the other 2 days, and still manage to have weekends off.

S is ready for preschool, so we are sending her 2 days per week and J will absorb the 3rd day.

We are all breathing a collective sigh of relief. Money isn’t everything but it’s always easier when there is decent steady money coming in. I will never be content being a housewife if my husband is struggling to make ends meet. I will always find a way to bring in some money.

(Well… that was a ramble!)